Random Mind #2

It was the normal routine again and again. But it was different air I breath each day. Different life lesson taught by the students every single day.

It was late at night when I saw a post from a highschool friend. Being in one of the biggest company in the country make me feel a bit jealous.its shaytaan or perhaps just my heart did not get the right tune at that time.*sigh*. A lot of them had accomplished so much in life when I am still crawling to complete my degree. The almost five and a half years spent for study yet nothing in between that I had actually done for others make me feel low. How much time have I wasted when I don't even have the luxury of time.

But again, looking at the bright side. That is not what I am looking for in life. And I am sure enough that He planned everything with the permanent marker pen way before I was here in Loh Mahfuz. And I am here writing with pencils and giving the eraser to Him to erase my unreasonable life plans.

It is not the matter of how high you are in the eye of the society, but it matters who you are in the eye of The Creator.

let's head up for the students tomorrow. wishing them to gain the knowledge delivered. Their life stories are not as fairytales as what we have been through. You know life hits them hard when they are young and you should be there to help them stand.

jaded's
night rambles.
2305  180913

Random Mind #1

Random mind # Take 1

It was over almost a year when we last met each other. Allah wills us to meet once again last week.maybe to inspire.or maybe to tell us how much have we disregard things and nikmat that He gave us since. 

I breakdown when my kids throw tantrums. 
I was mad when they could not sit and listen.
I feel helpless when both my hands hurt badly because of small cuts.

And after I saw her I think I shall look into the mirror and say..duhhh akma.look at urself.

diagnosed with glaucoma. fighting for her right eye for 24 years and was told that she could lost everything in between two hours due to retina detachment. and yet after everything, she told us that in all musibah there are sweetness that Allah gave her.

and she was grateful.for the only eye that she had. for all the trials from Him.

I would like to see the smile last. and I know she will laugh and smile as she is now.

may Allah grant her a clearer sight.she had so much to explore.and she is one of the light in the ummah. she had so much to do. a lot of people loving her to every bits.

tribute to Kak Syarnisa.
you might not know how much you inspire people.
but you did.
stay strong.
stay safe.
:')

jaded's. 160913 1334

Kids have lost their innocence

The first post after keeping myself away with any long writing stuff. Having less time or the truth I have too much to say yet words are not enough to express them all.

The third week has ended for practicum phase one. It was a breathtaking experience. Walking into school feels like walking through a hallway where everything is presented right in front of your eyes. The FUTURE of ummah I would say.

budak-budak yang 80% of them have family problem
budak-budak yang tak kenal erti hormat pendidik
budak-budak yang tukar a mini story book into a porn book
budak-budak yang buat smirk faces when they see teachers

tapi, the truth is.are these really masalah budak. I don't think so. They grew up by looking, listening and copying what the adults did.didn't they.they reflect us.

The truth is, teaching profession now and then is really different. If then, it is a noble profession but not now. People have a mindset that being a teacher is an easy tipsy stuff. masuk mengajar for one hour then thats it. As if they know the reality.

To teach them to be clever, there is no need to send your kids to school.really.but to teach them to be human.that is what we are for.teachers. we are not teaching them, English alone for example. we teach them life.manners.respect.as much as we could.

Tapi...it won't work with the society's mindset.kalau rasa mendidik itu mudah.then didik your kids from home. so then we can take care of the rest.

Having kids without properly teach them is just another sin that people unconsciously doing without even realizing it.

random.random.random.thoughts of being in school for quite some time.

cracking head to teach them English.

hope they will learn.not just the language.hope it went far beyond.

jaded
200713

Manusia, sekadar itukah hidup.

Arghhhhh!Tension menghadap assignment yang tak putus-putus.tangan laju menekan butang browser...layan youtube seround.Michael Jackson, 'man in the mirror' berdegung dari headphone Marley kat kepala.terpenjara dalam kalut esaimen.bosannya manusia.sekadar itukah hidup?

If you wanna make a change, start with the one in the mirror.bittertruth.

I would say this is the routine for most people out there, students terutamanya.hidup didalam circle esaimen, movie, makan, tido menghadap lecturer.yang hidup hanya sekadarnya.lets say five and a half year masa belajar, selama itu jugaklah masa di bazirkan dengan perkara-perkara yang tidak berfaedah.pemuda bagai hilang jiwa...zombified dengan esaimen dan kekangan kerja.akhirnya kaku manjadi robot yang mengikut susunan manusia.

Masa yang paling berharga adalah zaman muda.sirah dan sejarah agung islam dimulakan dengan berlatar belakangkan pemuda..nabi pernah bersabda yag bermaksud "telah menyokong/membantu ak para pemuda, sedangkan golongan tua membelakangi ak"..

dirumah al-arqam bin abi alarqam ..nabi berumur 40 tahun..saidina umar berumur 27 tahun..saidina uthman lebih muda dari umar..saidina ali lebih muda dari saidina uthman...musaib bin umairjuga dikisahkan memeluk islam sewaktu usia pemuda..dihantar oleh nabi ke madinah sblom hijrah..tiada rumah yang tidak diketuk mus'ab untuk menyampaikan islam..sultan muhammad al fateh sewaktu dilantik menjadi sultan berumur 19 tahun dalam tempoh 2 tahun berjaya membuka kota konstatinopal.. 

Inilah contoh manusia yang bukan hidup hanya sekadarnya

I was once asked, kalau constantinopole tu berjaya di tawan oleh al fateeh pada umur 24 tahun, what have I done for 23 years living?

Tersentak.di situ bermulanya langkah didalam medan dakwah dan tarbiyah.merangkak mencari diri.mencari himmah yang hilang dalam jiwa muda sendiri.mula di terjah dengan ISK, melarikan diri dari daurah syahadatul Haq dek kerana ustaz google bg definisi syahadatul haq yang bagiku scary.pemahaman cetek kalau aku tak dengar aku tak payah sampaikan buatkan aku berusaha melarikan diri.tapi, di heret akak-akak perkasa. Usai daurah balik ke rumah ibarat memikul beban batu seberat-beratnya di atas bahu.

Nah...manusia kalau di khabarkan tujuan hidupnya takkan mereka hidup sekadarnya.

"Aku tidak menciptakan jin dan manusia melainkan untuk mereka beribadah kepadaku" 51:56

"Ingatlah ketika tuhanmu berfirman kepada para malaikat: "sesunggunya Aku hendak menjadikan seorang Khalifah di muka bumi." 2:30

Andai manusia itu berfikir, oksigen ade fungsinya, binatang dan tumbuhan menyediakan manusia keperluan tenaga, serving human being to make them able to survive.but again, what are human being survive for?adakah sekadarnya untuk hidup, makan, belajar kerja kumpul harta dan mati di hujung nanti.

Often blinded by other purpose of life buatkan manusia buta akan ultimate purpose of life.untuk menjadi abid dan khalifah di muka bumi Allah.lalu mereka hidup hanya sekadarnya.hanya untuk survive hari esoknya.belajar hanya sekadarnya untuk lulus masuk universiti.semuanya sekadarnya.

Contradict.when we have less than a century to prepare for life of eternity our very actions shudnt be 'sekadarnya'. Jadilah  orang yang bukan hidupnya hanya sekadarnya.having said that aiming for jannah, neither of our actions should be done leisurely.siapa lagi yang boleh mengubah kita melainkan diri sendiri.

"Sesunggunnya Allah tidak akan mengubah keadaan sesuatu kaum melainkan mereka mengubah keadaan yang ada pada diri mereka sendiri" 13:11

Sekian

Fitnah dai'e

Mata mendongak memandang langit

Langit bumi Malaysia tak jauh bezanya dengan langit di bumi brisbane

Mungkin.langitnya sama.bi'ahnya ,menyesak jiwa.aku rindu suasana Brisbane.mana langkah manusia, penuh dengan akhlak.bak kata syeikh muhamad abduh.aku melihat islam di bumi bukan muslim.tapi sebaliknya di bumi muslim.bittertruth.kaki menjejak kembali bumi Malaysia,kelilingnya aku melihat manusia yg ratanya beragama Islam.

Proses mencari tuhan itu gayanya makin sukar bila bertatih di bumi yang dikatakan 'islam' itu sendiri,dek kerana banyaknya kelabu.mungkin samar jadinya.melangkah kaki tersangkut.tangan meraba bak jengkaut.mengikis kesekian sisa iman yang berbaki.bila yang berjubah labuh di kecam pensyarah, dikatakan kolot tak mampu bersuara gagah lantang.bila cubaaan-cubaan menjaga ikhtilat dikatakan tidak menjaga persaudaraan lelaki perempuan.bila kepala pening memikirkan diri yangtak putus menjadi fitnah agama.di mana silapnya.buntu.

Tapi kembali merangkak mencari yang abadi.adakah kamu menyangka kamu beriman sedangkan kamu tidak di uji.ahh manusia.bicara gaya seorang dai'e.tapi hati rapuh melawan gelojak hati.diuji sedikit melatah bukan persis dai'e.

So...heads up.reflect diri sbg seorang dai'e.mungkin lemah diri.akhlaq tak cukup ikut nabi.

Random write up

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Jaded