squeee the lemon...make it as lemon juice.suck it all.Allah is forever wit you.

Monday, April 30, 2012

heart ramblings



It has been awhile shabby-dusty-blog...
time envy me much or its just me who constantly failing to keep up with the time..
thought of shutting this down...as this blog pon hidup segan mati tak mahu.
but...it seems to be my last option of escapism 
writes in piece of paper and throw it away
draw what I think crumble it and put them in the bin
walk on the bridge and my heart melts watching sunset
step out from house and watch so cuddly cloud makes me smile
bring my camera and walk around the lake watching itik buat kuak lentang make me sengih x ingat dunia
luar alam I am...but few escapisms for countless times when i couldnt keep up with my own heart battle
hard.enuf said.
this year is really tough.
for heart which cant just settle down.
losing my support system 
for a cold me to cry even they crossed my mind
as tough as i appeared to be.
I just cant keep up.
May Allah bless them for changing me for a better person
owe them big time
my prayers always with you guys.always

looking for the root of the problem...and its really a test from Allah
How much I can endure...how much I could take.
To change for good aint easy.and the three months home affects me in every way possible
came back here crippled here and there
to heal back all the broken parts...take longer time then before
an advise...I am losing my heart.and the journey to find back the heart aint easy
looking for support...so I wont be lost.but paranoid of any attachment makes it a lot more harder.

and at the end...here I am...as blur as I could be.as heartbroken and haywire as I could say.Big hug for those who can endure.and those who cant.because i know.I am a tough creature for anyone to handle with care.wheauuu~

whatever it is...
what is life if it is just plain without any splash of dark colours

jaded's 30042012

I made a promised to myself it will not be about heart ranting...but here I am ranting over stuff.I think nobody cares.peace.^^.V


One strong girl

Distance never separates two hearts that really care,
 for our memories span the miles and in seconds we are there.
 But whenever I start feeling sad, because I miss you,
 I remind myself how lucky I am to have someone so special to miss.. ;)

As icy cold and less responsive i could be at certain period of time
and how much am pushing everyone away
thanks to you for keep knocking on the door
weirdo i am when it comes to heart matters..
and you know it well aite friend

so...i specially dedicate this post for you over there
how hard life hits you
how your heart and my heart berbolak balik each and everytime
remember that Allah is always watching you
when it seems that life is falling apart
try to collect all the small pieces together
put them back and glue dengan gam cap gajah A+++ 
let it shatters because after that only u will get stronger

my deepest apologies
for being so carefree about others
honestly~i am not at my right state of mind
too much too compute and am pulling away
will be back soon enuf..^^.V
looking for a lost heart...corny.haha
but i mean it...struggle.battle.war zone.inside.unexplained.
do take care.
Ingat purpose of life
and never let anything pull you away from that
less useful advice for me yet endless haphazard ranting and comments

jaded's for the one who never left.
u make my life in every way possible.

jaded30042012...while am doraemon like wrapped with comforter and jumper while writing this.hahaha